Home #Hwoodtimes Red Bows & Rings – Or: How Not To Marry A Sociopath

Red Bows & Rings – Or: How Not To Marry A Sociopath




Hollywood, CA (The Hollywood Times) – 12/04/2018 – Hollywood, land of dreams, promises and romantic hearts fulfilled – in a town that equally crushes them – but there are always the stars… right? I love the old joke of the eternal optimist who jumps off the Empire State Building and as he drops past the office worker’s window on the 26th floor – he yells out with a thumbs up: “So far so good!”

It’s the holiday season bringing everything in fantastical 3 & 4-D projections that magnifies our feelings and vulnerabilities. I believe in online or offline dating, meeting and the hope that goes with greeting someone new who just might be the one who has your back but I also know that with holidays the scamming, spamming and outright malicious come forward for no reason other than… they can… and they will do harm, so be careful. I’ve had special in my life many times and known great depth in love no matter the outcome but this breed of dog, or cat, is one that should be arrested and they are rarely caught.

The guy in this poem has fathered over 20-plus kids, taken women for money, showed them they were special, got what he wanted and ruined them. He had a list of ways to control, manipulate and seduce women posted on a blog that he was teaching younger men. I was one of the lucky ones – yet never will forget how someone came so magically into my life, while all of my friends and colleagues felt he was perfect for me. But, my then little boy and my stomach eventually told me otherwise.

Being taken advantage of has nothing to do with intelligence – so don’t berate yourself or allow anyone else to make you feel bad. I’ve heard so many horror stories since this first was published and none were deserved.

Beware the overly attentive who seem almost mystical in knowing what to say or do to reach you or your child/ren – sad commentary but I wish you all safe and happy, happy holidays!

Red Bows & Rings
Or: How Not To Marry A Sociopath

Red bows adorned the bar and tree
Holiday  season was in full flight, you see
They met amid the most magical of seasons
Little did she know the outcome or reasons

This knight of shy chivalrous joy
Turned out to be anything but a good boy
He took her to special places, one by the sea
Even one in Puerto Rico, almost the death of she

He slowly got her to do things he liked to do
The gifts and attention arrested her flu
Her little boy watched with innocent eyes
As any adult would surely analyze

The man of many faces gave her a ring
So shiny, huge and intricately a bling-bling
He danced around her son and her friend to gift her
As she opened the box she didn’t know how to answer

It was the first Christmas she hadn’t wanted to see
Living had become routine, depression a guarantee
This noble man opened her inner desires and wants
The love of his words etched into her as delicious fonts

For months he dazzled, amused and beguiled
Their mutual attraction appeared erotic and wild
After the lid of the heart shaped box was lifted
Her mouth fell in realization of the deceit she had been gifted

The knight smiled and raced out the door
Stunned, she looked down at the floor
The Christmas lights glowed all around her
Her son and friend asked why she looked on with wonder

To the jeweler she went as things felt too good to be true
She gave him the ring and asked him what to do
Red-faced he asked her what she wanted it to be
He said it was an elegant fake setting couldn’t she see?

Crushed she returned home and put the ring in its box
She would’ve been happier with new Christmas socks
The depth of a love and romantic lies
Hit her to the core when she came to realize

Every special place that they had made theirs
He had taken countless others without worry or cares
It took her many years to get over the knight who came
A troll in hiding with no conscience to blame

It was almost Easter and very befitting
The ring was returned without a harsh word hitting
In a year’s time she would find he had married
A new victim he had seduced, ruined and left harried

Red bows had a new meaning and painfully so
No longer were they about gifts or love to bestow
Had it not been for her son with innocent, wise eyes
She would not be free to learn the love of compromise

Love doesn’t come in a tiny present wrapped with red bow
The depth of love is so much further don’t you know
No longer a rush, a worry to fix what never was wrong
She found with time the right person would come along

© 2003